I am home again. Jake and I arrived home last week and things have been very interesting. It is strange to see so many cars and to once again know traffic as being more then three cars backed up at big batts. People are everywhere! There are pros and cons to the amount of people in the city.
I still have time, i am not working. I find myself, now with the options of stuff to do constantly trying to fill my time. Its hard to sit alone and do nothing. I am sure soon enough i will be yearning for the emptiness of a day.
I am happy to be home yet I miss being where I was.
I can hardly believe that in 8 or so weeks I will be having a baby. It is amazing to feel kicks and movements and to know that God is forming this child in His image. Oh how blessed we are.

about time...

Well I have a moment to sit down and be in front of a computer, so i better blog.

Things here in Pine Ridge are coming to an end, fast. I can hardly believe that we only have 19 days left. There is so much i will miss about this place. I will miss the family i have made and the wonderful coffee from higher ground. Yet there are things to look forward to as well.

I have been involved in many conversations with our friends the Liens about living together. Who knows where it will be. There is talk about spending a year in Hawaii living in community and being the church to people there. We have also spoke about living here on the Reservation. It is all in Gods hands. I will trust that He knows what is best and it might not be the easy road. Sometimes i get frustrated with my own selfishness, what i think is best in my life. I live my life not for myself but for God. The road i have chosen will be filled with twists and turns, bumps and bridges. I do not believe being a follower of Christ calls me to be comfortable and stagnant. I am called to live a radical unique life that only God knows the direction of.

Now that i just spill things onto this page i must end. Soon the next chapter of our life will begin, but i will not sit by and wait. I will live the life i have right now at this moment.

Pistachios and a Milk shake

I never seem to know what i am going to write about until my fingers get used to the keys and then the words begin to flow. We are back, and right now i am happy that i am not in Minneapolis. The weather here has been simply amazing. I can hardly believe it is January. Today it was 63 degrees. Ok now that i have turned into an old person by talking about the weather i should tell you i turned 25 yesterday. 25, my pastor likes to say now you are a quarter of a century old. That sure seems old, but i have always liked getting older. Will see if i say that when i am 40.

I had a good birthday, wish i could have been with all my friends and family from back home. I did though get to celebrate with great friends from Pine Ridge. One of my friends said 'hey just think next year you will be celebrating with a 7 month old.' Wow that will be a world of difference. Speaking of children, Jake and i get to find out what we are having on the 12th of February. Start your bets! I have no clue what we are having, it will be a surprise. I seem to have moments of forgetting i am even having a child, then i have moments of holy cow i am having a baby. Both are good and a little strange. I can not wait till all of our friends start having babies. That should be crazy.

Anyways, things are good, not easy but good. There are days that i want to go home, then i have days where i can't even imagine being back. Oh the good and the bad. Thanks again everyone for supporting us out here, we need you! Hope all is well and feel free to give us a call!

Well here i am again.

December 28th 2008,

I can hardly believe that it is almost 2009. I feel as if we should having flying cars and transporters like the Jettson's had. Oh we are so far away from those things. Perhaps my child will get to fly a car around. I can only dream right? I have a slight feeling this blog will be full of random thoughts, feelings and sprinkled with passion.
So let me begin...

I am so happy to be home! I have loved every minute of it! Wait let me take that back, I have not loved the moments when i feel my stomach approaching my mouth. Other than those times, this has been simply wonderful. I love spending time with my family and my inspiring friends. I am so blessed to have good friends! Random thought coming... And i am so thankful for food!

I was recently shown a friends blog and he spoke about the desire, the thirst for deep invigorating conversation. I couldn't agree more Kevin. I have always had that feeling. I know our friends can go deeper and when it happens my soul feels a slight renewal. Right now I am sitting at Panera bread thinking about so many things. Talking with my husband about Adam and Eve, good and evil, and being revolutionary. Jake right now is reading a book that helped inspire me to be set apart, and to see the world as Christ sees it. The Irresistible Revolution, by shane claiborne. Here is one thought from the book that is hard to digest.

"There is no doubt that we must mourn those lives lost on September 11th. We must mourn the lives of the soldiers. But with the same passion and outrage, we must mourn the lives of every Iraqi who is lost. They are just as precious, no more, no less. In our rebirth, every life lost in Iraq is just as tragic as a life lost in New York or D.C. And the lives of the thirty thousand children who die of starvation each day is like six September 11ths every single day, a silent tsunami that happens every week."



Wow! I know most may disagree with me but i see no need for retaliation. I do not see how redemptive violence brings peace to anyone. How is there such a thing as a "just war"? When is is OK for us to take up the High Throne and be the judge of those around us. I believe that is in the hands of God. We are to mourn with those who are mourning! And as Americans we are not the only ones mourning. Although we tend to instigate reasons of mourning for others.
We are ALL created in the image of God. You and I, the children in Africa and the mother and fathers in Iraq. We bare the image of Christ.


This blog has been a spewing of my thought and feelings. I am overwhelmed and its time to hand the computer to my husband. I hope there can be many conversation in the future about the love of Christ.

Oh the good news...

Who would have thought that I would be having a baby, and the first one of our Minnesota friends at that. I was sure it would have been Hope and Zach and then a FEW years later perhaps Jake and I. Oh how God works.

At first i could not believe it. Even though deep inside i new it was true. I am not angry or frustrated, I am content. I have always been a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and so did this. I am going to be a mother... (please with hold from laughing. I say that to myself as well.) This will be the biggest learning experience of my life. I am excited for all the moments we will have with our child.

The good, bad and ugly!

We are excited to share in this experience with you all. Keep us in your prayers and be ready to babysit... just kidding!

We miss you all and can not wait to have some face to face conversations!

a look into my life...

Here I am again. Sitting in my little home in #4 and wondering 'what the heck should i write about.' so many times i desire to write something amazing, but I am not an author nor an amazing poet I am simply me.
Things here are going amazing. I have been a little under the weather the past few weeks, but finally I feel like my old self again... Kind of!
the life i live here in Pine Ridge is a much slower, relaxed life. More time to ponder life's biggest question. Time to wonder why am I here. Time to wonder, who will i become.
One quote i enjoy is...

"Perhaps the questions shouldn't be 'what will i do with my life?' but 'who are you going to become?'"






There are so many good days here. Don't get me wrong, life is not perfect! Daily i struggle with home sickness. So much of me wants to go back to the life i am used to. Knowing fare well that i would sit most of my days in discontent with where my life is. I do not want to fit it, to blend in, to just be another. I want to live a life that is different, to speak truth and to have LOVE spill from my soul. I am here to be refined.




"Are you not much more valuable then they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"





There are so many beautiful moments in life, and when i worry about the next i pass so many moments by. I will never know all the moments i have missed, but my soul longs for the beautiful moments in life. Not the easy or selfish but the truly beautiful in Gods eyes, those are the moments i what to be around for.





My randomness is starting to bother me. My thoughts are all over the place and all i can do it take a moment and breath and enjoy this beautiful moment!

before there was snow...

Well winter has arrived here on the Reservation. The beautiful landscape has been covered with even more beautiful blanket of snow. I could hardly believe how large the snow flakes were. When i awoke the next morning it felt as if I had been moved to another place. Now the dirt and nastiness of winter have set in. Mud, sand, brown dirty snow is all the eye can see. I wait for the next snow fall to once again cleanse this land.

In other news... Things here are still going wonderfully. There are times when we feel cabin fever set in. There is not much to do around here. filling our time with positive thing are very important. Jake as even taken up painting. (Thanks to my friend Michelle back home) i also created one masterpiece, a buffalo. I believe i did ok. If anyone is interested in buying the art work just let me know. :)

I thought i would post a few photos as well. the first one is of our staff, we went to Rapid City and stumbled upon the most beautiful terrain. the next is of the most amazing tree captured right as the sun was setting. and the third is my lovely (not always thinking) husband. on both sides of him it was a extreme drop off. HE IS CRAZY!