T minus 3 days...

and counting.

I can hardly believe that I have almost been here for 2 weeks. Time sure does fly. This has been a great trip for me. i have been able to work at the coffee shop and spend time with the Matthews. Being here, if only for two weeks has once again ignited my heart for this place. I really do love it here, it may be hard and frustrating at times, but there is such love here. Nash and I have been welcomed with sincere hearts and cared for with compassion. My only wish is that Jake would have been able to join us on our journey. He has to work I understand, but my life is not the same without him near me. I love him.
Off subject sorry.

Anyways I sure am glad God brought me back here again, even if only for a short while.

It's a farming world...

The past few days have been a good break from the busyness of life. Here on the Rez everything tends to happen and a much slower pace, well everything other then the driving. There are some crazy drivers out here, but where are there not? Anyways. Nash and I have spent much of our time playing with Leon and Belva's 3 niece's and 1 nephew. Nash just loves them. They love him as well. I have been able to reconnect with some of my dear friends out here and spend some much needed time at Higher Ground (the coffee shop). It has been a little tough traveling with Nash, he has been taken out of his element and now his schedule is way out of whack. It has been leaving me one tired mom during the day. Thank God for helpful kids around here who love Nash. Today was a fun and refreshing day. It started with church at The Gospel Fellowship, which I always enjoy. It truly is a great church family. Then on to a visit to the cohen home (the local elderly housing). After leaving there I felt an urge to go horse back riding and happened to say this out loud. Belva mentioned she knew just the place, so we were off. We packed Nash, Kasey, and Kylah in the car and headed for "the Ranch". It was wonderful. To be in the open, to feel the soil beneath my boots and smell the fresh air was revitalizing. Thank you God for your creation.
Nash had an amazing first farm experience. Horses, cows, cats oh my. Here are a few photos of the trip so far. As great as it has been. We are excited to see Jake again. We miss him and feel incomplete with out him.

Peace.

let the vacation begin...

Nash and I made it safe and sound. We started pretty early, well not that early in the morning around 7 am. Our friend "auntie Hope" brought us to the airport and THANKFULLY helped me carry in 1 large suitcase, a car seat, stroller, 2 carry-ons a jacket and Nash. The whole time walking up to the check in I was thinking.. 'what did I get myself into?' Luckily Nash was able to get on the plane after a slight scare late tuesday night realizing he doesn't have a birth certificate. Why no birth certificate?Long story! Anyways Once we checked in, passed through security with some help from the security officer lady saying to her coworker, 'help this lady she's alone doing this by herself.' Thanks rub it in why don't you.. then I thought hey I will take all the help I can get, this stuff in HEAVY! 

Our first flight and Nash's REAL first flight was from Minneapolis to Denver. We were lucky to have an open seat right next to us, which I quickly took over with baby crap. The gentlemen next to us was wonderful, he made sure the air vent wasn't blowing on the baby, but selfishly I enjoyed the cool breeze after working up a sweat carry everything. Nash feel asleep for a good hour then the last hour we played with whatever we could find to keep his interest. The Styrofoam cup, bad for the environment but great airplane toy came in handy. 

Once we landed in Denver we were at gate 54. Our next flight from Rapid was due to depart from gate 58. Praise the Lord. I was carrying two HEAVY bags, pushing nash in a tiny stroller and doing everything I could to keep him from crying. Once we got to our gate, I unloaded. sat down and not even a minute later the man came on the loud speaker say 'I am sorry but the flight to Rapid has been moved to gate 98, we thought you all could use a little more cardio.' 

You have got to be kidding me. So I got up repacked, and got ready for the cross country hike. Once we arrived I sat down again relieved to have arrived in one piece. Then to our luck. I heard the same thing again only this time to gate 86. Oh dear. In the end we made it. Got on the plane and Nash fell asleep the moment after take off and slept the entire flight even through the landing. 

And now we are here. Enjoying our stay. Nash Loves sleeping in his PeaPod. They are tents for babies and much easier to carry around then a pack'n Play. More update on our trip will come I am sure. 

 Peace. 

a few thoughts from a searching soul...

I have been thinking and reading and listening a lot recently about the word and the meaning of Church. In the past few years I have began to feel a discontent with the American Church, unsure of my reasonings I have started to search where and why this discontent lays heavy on my soul.

Let me start by saying, there is none on the face of this earth who has or is doing everything perfect. We live in a fallen world, but with that being said we are to strive for perfection.
  2nd Corinthians 13:11 "Finally, brothers, good-by, Aim for perfection, listen to my appeal, be of one mind, live in peace. And the God of love and peace will be with you."


(this blog may be a little scatter brained, sorry)


I have decided to do a self study of the book of Acts, so far I have so many questions. Here is the passage that I have been focusing on and trying to figure out how this looks today, and why does it have to look different then it did then?

Acts 2:42-47
"they devoted themselves to the apostles teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts, they broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts. praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved."


After reading this passage I tried to find a few podcasts talking about the idea of community centered church. I found one that really began to help refocus me thoughts on Christianity today. It was a podcast delivered by Shane Claiborne called Resurrecting Church; The mark of God's kingdom on earth.
I felt humbled by the ideas of how we can implement Acts 2 in our lives today. I would love to hear what others think on these ideas of church, what should it look like? I do not want to focus on the negatives and what the church is doing wrong, but focus on how it can be better. How can we as individuals implement change?

Here are a few links to a few GREAT podcasts that I would encourage you to take the time and listen to.
Shane Claiborne: Resurrecting Church: UYWI 2008
Rob Bell; The human heart is a mystery.

From Hate to Love???

I hate to run, but as long as a part of me hates it, I know there is a part of me who could LOVE it.

Or I should just keep telling myself that. For some strange reason I have decided to take part in an imaginary 5K happening in 9 weeks. For all of you who know me even a little bit know that I DO NOT run. I used to fake side-aches, asthma attacks, amputation, fainting anything to get me out of running the 2 mile in High school. I can remember coming in Last... always, but not really caring, cause well I had a serious ailment...
Now in the age of the biggest loser and being able to sit on my couch and watch 245 pound people run marathons,  I figure I should be able to run a 5K, right?

Lets HOPE!

I have a feeling this will be an interesting adventure. Hopefully it doesn't end up like my 30 day blog challenge. We all know how that went. But on the positive side, it got me blogging so hopefully this will get me running. If anyone feels like joining me on this adventure let me know. The imaginary 5K will be held in early May. I would love to run with friends... family and even strangers. Lets get off our rears and get in gear.

Oh how motivational did that sound? We can do it.

Left or Right...

Here is a great prayer I was given once and now I am at a loss for who wrote it. Help me out if you know.

May God bless you with discomfort at easy answers, half-truths and superficial relationships 

So that you may live deep within your heart.

May God bless you with anger at injustice, oppression, and exploitation of people 

So that you may work for justice, freedom 

and peace.

May God bless you with tears to shed for those who suffer pain, rejection, hunger and war,

So that you may reach out your hand

to comfort them and to turn their pain into joy.

And may God bless you with enough foolishness

to believe that you can make a difference in the world, 

So that you can do what others claim cannot be done.

To bring justice and kindness

to all our children and the poor.

Amen

Right now Jake and I are going through a time of contemplation, do we make a left or a right? We have come to a fork in the road. Something is pulling our spirits and we are unsure how to answer that pull. Some might be aware of the struggle I speak of, others wondering what the heck I am talking about. Well here it is... Pine Ridge! Surprise, surprise... Right? That place is always in the back of our minds, sometimes the main thing on our minds. There is not a day that goes by when it doesn't come into my consciousness in some form. We have a great life here in Minneapolis. Wonderful family and friends only miles or steps away, but there is a still small voice inside calling us to something different. The risk would be large, but if this voice is God, would the reward not be worth it? 

"Wake up from your sleep,

Climb out of your coffins;

Christ will show you the light"

May the Lord our God, make his way known to us.

 

 

Awake my soul...

This post comes from a soul struggling to become humble. With that being said, please continue to read with compassion and grace and most of all forgiveness for things said and unsaid.

I have been granted the honor to be a part of such great conversations in the past few weeks. I hadn't really noticed how much I had missed intimate connection between friends until I was given a taste of it again. Yet I know there is so much more to be had. God has created us to have intimate fellowship with others, not just small talk, but real talk. To divulge our joys, moments of splendor our sorrows, struggles, regrets, and frustrations, to unleash our true souls to each other and be embraced with love. What is it that keeps this from happening? Sure there are the easy excuses:

We are just different people now.
We are going in different directions in life.
I just don't think they will understand.
I am to busy.
I forgot to call.
... and the list goes on and on.

Guilty am I who types on this blog of all the stated excuses above, but I am looking at everything all wrong. You my friend, we have the deepest connection, one that will endure forever. We are intertwined by something great. My friend, we share the same creator. From the dust we were given life. We inhabit the same earth, and our lungs are filled with the same air that gives life to all. What more do we need to connect?
I may be shorter then you, paler, or blue eyed instead of brown, but deep down our hearts beat the same, our blood is the same shade. We are the same. We are made to connect.

What is holding us back?